Let's all be Forming

Many of us are guilty of this one. You would see someone from your hood back in the days or an old primary school mate and you'll act like you don't recognise the face. Haba! What's with the attitude(shakara) anyway?

For quite a while, I have been seeing this guy in the area he would drive by and act like he doesn't know who I was, many times I'll try to get eye contact and say hello but he'll carry his nose up like he doesn't know me. Haaaa...issokay.

Na so one day na, he came to use the ATM in front of my office and his card got stuck, apparently he didn't have a dime on him and it was a Friday evening after banking hours. I came outside to see a customer of mine and bam! there he was pacing up and down. He was talking to the security men trying to inquire how he could get his card back, when they saw me step out they asked him to see me. Lo and behold, my guy humble by force. He started approaching me with that shameful grin on his face and me sef I acted like I didn't see him.Yelz of coz.
I turned to face the customer who was waiting to see me first and I made him wait for about 7-10 minutes before asking him what he wanted.
He started with the fake accent " hi, eerm actually my card got stuck in the atm, i was asked to see you. I laughed, " wo bi, don't you know this face?" I asked.
"Actually I do but I can't place it" he said with a sheepish smile on his oblong face. I asked him to come back on Monday to see if his card could be retrieved. Then at that point he had no choice than to open up to me,he had no dime on him. I went back into the office and got my purse and gave him some money. Ever since then we became good friends.

Another scenario was one an old uni mate told me, she said she came to the Redemption camp for Holy ghost service and then at some point she needed to go to the loo when she got there she met a queue,as she was joining she saw one of our hostel mates from Uni but she refused to say hello.When she couldn't hold it in anymore she humbled herself and went to meet the other lady who was a member of the sanitation team in charge of the rest room and that was how she was saved from disgrace. Imagine if she actually let forming have its way. She for don shit for body Hehehe

Many times we run into people that we used to know from back in the days and then we begin to avoid them, not like it would do us harm if we greet them ooooo its just a shakara issue. Why she sef no greet me? we often forget that some of these people can be of help to us.
Some of us know people from back in the days who have become influential and successful but instead of being humble and asking for help we just keep saying I used to know that dude or that chic,we are quick to assume that they won't help and it's not in all cases ooooo some successful people still have a good head on their neck, down to earth and still reckon with people from their roots. They understand that we meet people for a reason. That your bunk mate, class mate, old church member etc can be of help to you or you could be of help to them at some point in life. I'm not saying you have to keep close ties with everyone but at least be civil. Say hi to them and go your way, not that you act like you don't know who they are. You might have gone far ahead of them but that doesn't mean you should feel like they are not worth your
15 seconds "hello,long time.Good to see you".

Everyone is important if you are not too proud to accept that everyone is important. You feel me?

Next time I see you and you form say u no know me ehn...I comment my reserve. *winks*

So tell me have you ever been snubbed by someone you used to know? Share your gist biko...drop a comment.

Have a blissful week.

I'm Leaving this church!

Hi everyone, i hope you had a great weekend? So how was church yesterday? I'm sure you must have been wondering what this title is all about. Well I'm just about to break it down.

A few days ago, my mother in law and I were chatting about church and the responsibilities of being a leader. Then she started narrating to me how sometimes when little issues come up, some people would threaten to leave the church. Now these issues vary;it could be a quarrel with a fellow church worker, the head of unit or the pastor.

It made me remember sometime ago when I decided to leave my church when I heard stuff some people said about me that wasn't true and it hurt me to think that it was people from my very own church that were spreading these false stories. Anyway I learnt...trust me I did.

Now the thing is, there is no wisdom in leaving your place of worship because you are offended with someone or some people whether it's the pastor or a fellow member,it's not worth it. Okay look at this, if the same thing they did to you whatever it might be,was done to you at work would you resign? Would you leave the place where you get your daily bread coz of some frivolous quarrel? So then why leave the place where you get watered spiritually coz of someone?

Now I won't come here and preach, i know it can be hard. Some Church people can be cold ass mean sometimes; they judge you even before you walk through the front door of the sanctuary, nowadays there are even cliques in church. You get to church and the seats in a whole row are taken with bags and purses for people who are still getting their makeup done at home. Sometimes they don't see you in church for weeks and nobody cares enough to give you a call...I know, I know trust me I do. However my point here is although church should be a haven for everyone sometimes it's not, we all have to accept that just like every other group or organisation the church is filled with people of diverse personalities and no matter how spirit filled we all claim to be sometimes our 'human nature' still shows its ugly side and we hurt each other but we must remember that we are not in church to see people or make friends, we are there to meet Jesus.
The twelveth chapter of Hebrews, the second verse says it all

" Looking unto Jesus , the author and finisher of our faith , who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross , despising the shame , and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God"(Nkjv)

I like the Message version of the bible the most coz it explains things in a more contemporary way it says

" Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we're in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he's there, in the place of honor, right alongside God"

Did you catch that part where it said he could put up with anything? That I like! You see, that was my lesson back then and I finally returned to my church. You are putting up with all the BS not because you can't react but because your mind is so fixated on your goal that you ignore all the crap and focus on the reason why you are in church in the first place.

Church is just like every other place, sometimes when younger people are placed in leadership roles they lose their minds for a bit and think they can talk to anyone how they like,older people also are not left out sometimes they think they can force people under them to do anything they command forgetting that it's church and people should be admonished, encouraged and not forced. Some people are just plain rude and disrespectful,no regard for the pastor or even ministers. Some come in there to oppress others with their 50 shoulder pads carrying themselves like they own the church, they say things like "Awa la bere church yi,ibo le tin bo?" apologies to non-yoruba readers or they say "that's not how it is done here" when someone suggests something new and beneficial to others. We all have them in our churches.

So my point in all of these is, nothing anybody does to you should make you leave your place of worship except you are led to do so. It's God's house it does NOT belong to the Pastor or the so called foundation members who feel like they own the church and no one has a right to start something new. You are a child of God, ain't nobody powerful
enough to send you out of your father's house when he still wants you in there.Another tough love side to this is, okay fine you wanna leave the church huh? Just remember that God has replacements and if you feel nothing would go on without you, think again! The other day it was Prophet Elijah feeling like he was the only one left but God quickly brought it to his notice that he had 7,000 on reserve. Check that out in the first book of Kings, the thirteenth to the eighteenth verse.No one is indispensable with God. He always has a backup...so dont be all mad and let someone else take your place in your own father's house. Remember you are the one privileged to be able to offer service to him,y'heard?

I hope one day we all understand that we are the church and not the building. We ourselves are the body of Christ!

Share your experiences,has anyone got you so pissed in church that you decided to leave? Share your thoughts by dropping comments on today's post.

Have a fantastic week.

How exactly do you feel?

Okay just look at this,we all graduated from school together,while some chose the safe path, some chose the path of uncertainties. They are called Entrepreneurs, i like to call them the risk takers. Salary earners have something to hope for at the end of the month...oga ta oga o ta...owo wan ma pe (oga sell,oga no sell their money no go reduce) however the entrepreneur only hopes that business would move,that he'll sell his wares, that he'll get contracts,that profit would be higher this month. It's only the brave that can do stuff like that,it takes courage to turn down juicy offers and follow your own path....at the end of the day they have mouths to feed just like the salary earners,they've got bills to pay.Mama and Papa might not really understand what being an entrepreneur is since they retired from the railway corporation and they see Tokunbo's mother enjoying the fruit of her labour after her son who was your class mate got a job with a multi-national company.

"So what is this entrepreneur thing anyway?",Mama asks everytime."Why don't you just get yourself a job? I still have some contacts at the railway corporation",Papa said. "Maybe they could be of help."

Despite all odds the brave ones refuse, they follow their dreams tenaciously,never minding the days when there's no dime in the pocket, forgetting the days when jobs are delivered yet customers refuse to pay up.

Y'all are the real MVP'S....I celebrate you!

Tag all your entrepreneur friends and if you are one celebrate yourself! If you have a minute, kindly comment and share with us how exactly you feel on the days when you're uncertain about your choice of being an entrepreneur? How do you encourage yourself?

Just one of my muses...till i write you again, Peace, love and hugs.

ROI? terms and conditions apply

Wasup everyone...thanks to God for a brand new week. So my thoughts this morning are on return on investment. Return on investment (ROI) is the benefit to an investor resulting from an investment of some resource. A high ROI means the investment gains compare favorably to investment cost. Enough said...

A while ago I was chatting with a male acquaintance , we were talking about the present state of the economy and how one has to be very careful before investing in anything. Due to the current situation the returns might not be commensurate to the cost of the investment . So on a lighter note he said he was also being very careful about his human investment . I laughed at the thought of human investment...my own idea of human investment is when an organisation invests in their employees through trainings, workshops and seminars so that in turn they can put their knowledge into good use for the profit of the organisation. However,what the guy was talking about was quite different, he brought his phone out and showed me a picture of a very beautiful young lady. He said she was his investment and that he has been sponsoring her education since 100 level. He was very happy that the lady is now in her final year but the thought of her going for Nysc scares him. He said he had heard so much about the famous educated rich fine boys who snatch away the sheep that uneducated men like him have been nurturing for years.I asked him if the lady knew his expectations from her after her youth service and he said she should.He said she knows that he wants an educated wife and that's why he has been caring for her over the years...Mr nice guy!
I made him understand that for every investment there are terms and conditions what they call treasury agreement and that it is very risky to assume that the person you are investing in knows what your expectations from him/her are at the end of the tenor.

It's important to let people know what your expectations are in a relationship, especially in a relationship where you are more of the giver, except if we want to deceive ourselves only God gives unconditional love. We all are in that friendship, relationship or marriage for some reasons and if after investing so much the other party fails to do their part, then we start hurting. So trust me before you start/ continue investing in anybody please be sure that they are willing to do their own part of the bargain.

That's the only way you can get return on investment for your time, care,all the shopping,the foreign trips, the expensive cuisine, the monthly recharge cards or BIS subscription,the educational support,the drop offs even during fuel price hike or scarcity the list goes on and on.
If there's no properly laid down agreement you CAN'T blame the babe if at the end of the 4 year university educational support or whatsoever you have been doing for her she tells you, 'you are just like a big brother to me'....hahaha that's when they brother zone you and one other guy would come and eat from where he did not sow....hehehe.

Talk about it now oh!

Those are my thoughts...have a phenomenal week.

Cheers!

L'queen.

Is Marriage Really Worth It?

Well hello there y'all it's been so long, Mehn l missed y'all too.Thanks for the calls, messages,and emails...I'm here now. So what has eveybody been up to lately? For me it's been work, school, marriage, mummy duties and all of that grown up stuff but trust me I never stopped writing but nothing was ever finished enough to grace the page of the blog. Anyway, I'm here now so let's relate.

About a month ago some of my single friends and members of the young wives association were having our usual gist sessions and we discussed every thing from career, fashion, music, fellowship and finally we hit on marriage I was teasing one of them who is a couple of years older than l am about when she would finally get married and without even letting me land one of the other single ladies present scowled at me and asked "is the marriage thing really worth it sef?" I was amazed because this is someone who was so into love and relationships back in our Uni days...what could have happened in the last 5 years to make her say that?

When she narrated different stories of unsettled homes less than 6 months in marriage and some other marriage issues I began to understand her viewpoint . Lately social media has taken us into the homes of some of our beloved celebrities and we all have started to realize that beyond the glitz and glamour of expensive weddings, vera wang gowns, mai atafo suits,instagram and facebook loved up posts,#mce and #wce real life issues come up in all marriages.

Trust me I'm not speaking as an expert or anything like that coz the truth is when it comes to marriage, no one is an expert.All I know is that marriage requires some kinda major level of commitment that if you know you ain't ready for all that just jejely and gbadunly stay single.
YOU CAN'T THINK FOR YOURSELF ALONE ANYMORE IN MARRIAGE !

Another thing I would say is if you aren't ready to stay through the good and the bad,happy and sad times,boxed up and broke ass times then just maybe marriage is not really your thing.

Look at our parents, many of them started from the bottom and now they have risen to greater heights because they were patient with each other and they never gave up but what we see today is women or even men who want someone with a million dollar bank account.
Not like that's a bad thing but let's be real we don't have so many of those out there,our economy is hard enough so everyone is a general manager of the little change they earn, so why not pick your own man or woman and build that million naira dollar empire together?

Like I said earlier I'm no expert in these marriage thing either but one of the major reasons I wrote this is to let people know that as much as it is good to build your home on Christ, he would not come down and work it out for you, I stand to be corrected. But I think its your job to work out your marriage with fear and trembling. Even the bible says faith without works is dead so asides putting faith and belief in God to make your marriage a great one it requires your effort and no it's not just some minimal effort but thoughtful , planned and consistent effort from both parties.
Let that CCT formula never ever be forgotten; Communication(not just wetin we go chop this night kinda talk but are you happy being married to me kinda talk on a regular so things can keep improving,share thoughts and ideas)
Care(not just i love you after each phone call but how far with your goals for the year that's some deep level of caring and commitment to your spouse,the little things count)
Trust( don't get all paranoid because that lady admired his dressing, quit the where were you 2 minutes ago questions trust your spouse and be trust worthy too).

All in all marriage is a full time job there is no part-time to it, so be ready to "work, work , work, work ,work, work" in Rihanna's voice.

Marriage can be beautiful,ask couples who have done for it 40 years and counting but it's not beans Mehn!

For y'all who are not married yet, please do a lot of getting to know each other and let God guide you.
Be sure you can stick to that person when the beauty and charm begin to fade and when the money goes honey would you be ready to stay?

Think about it!

Those are my thoughts, so if you ask me i think Marriage is worth it.

Marriage is honourable in all!

A/N: What are your thoughts?
do you agree to the fact that marriage is worth it? Don't just read, please share your views

Till i write you again...Toodles.